CHILDREN, SOME MYSTERY ON THEIR OWN

CHILDREN, SOME MYSTERY ON THEIR OWN

Walking back from work exhausted one day, I spotted some children walking towards me. I noticed they had been staring at me from a distance and I wondered if there was something on me which shouldn't be there. Getting nearer, I was contemplating if I should say a word to them or not. Then I was "pulled" out of my thought by a simple question. "Aunty, please did you slip or something"? I was taken aback but decided to ignore him politely with a simple smile. But the question came again, louder this time, and the children together with the one who asked the question stood Infront of me waiting for an answer. Honestly, I was lost and suddenly became tight-lipped but they were waiting for an answer so I just nodded and left them.

I get stares everytime and everyday when I step out and it will be very silly to admit that I don't get shaken most of the time. But most often, I just brace myself with the simple words "it is well" or "I am the motivation some seek". Getting these stares, makes one very uncomfortable but to the curious and bold ones who muster the courage to ask, I give an abridged version of the story. The pain with which is it said lessens most often.

Not to say there is something wrong with me or something but I noticed as human as we are, people naturally stare just that some do it more than others. Back to the children, I was still deep in thoughts about them when I reached home and I didn't know what made the child so bold to approach me to ask his question. Then it dawned on me that maybe, or for a fact, the environment people find themselves in, either makes one bold or timid.

Being at a totally new environment for some months, I daresay this is very true and it is a habit people find comfortable putting on as an attitude. During my early times as a "stranger", as soon as I pass by, people start whispering and sometimes it is very loud for me to hear that what is being said is all about me. And honestly speaking, they don't care if you happen to hear them or not.Things asked mostly centers on "who is she" and "what's her motive of coming here".

Inasmuch as it irks me when these are being asked either right Infront of me or behind me with the simple notion that their being rude and nosy, I came to a conclusion that they (the people) are worried about their security. I say this because once they get answers to their questions and make you out, they automatically relax around you and become very welcoming.

In other places, due to the hustle people go through, people are barely noticed. It takes something as much as a mishap before would be "paused" out of their busy schedule to ask, "what happened" and "how come?" This makes no room for personal security. People are sure to say security gadgets are all in place to check strangers or anything strange within the vicinity, their houses and their rooms. Things which do not happen within one's house are almost always ignored because a popular saying "di wu lane mu" (which literally means,mind your own business) will be said to you. But with all these, where tends to be the role of neighbours acting like "actual" watchdogs, if I may say, for you?

Still about the children, I again came up with another realization that their upbringing is also a factor to the bold attitude they possess. Mind you, being bold is very different from being rude. With some, their parents who serve as their first role models in life, confront issues in a bold manner and hence, they pick up this trait. When there is a problem at hand, people are made to cool off and then afterwards it is addressed to the hearing of all. This makes it such that views are expressed and "unfamiliar feelings" are done away with.

But for some others, timidity is what they are exposed to. Things go wrong but they are never addressed properly and "mixed feelings" is what they move about with. Instead of trashing things out, the mere sound of the elderly ones, if harsh tend to make the little ones scurry off. Then an impression is created. An impression that, things whether good or bad are to be left as they are for peace to prevail. Whether is yields pain or not, it is meant to be endured till some "breakthrough" comes.

This results in children shielding so much that it causes some psychological issues for them. Depression, inferiority complex or low self esteem are but the few I will mention. These might start without them knowing but when it gets out of hand, it might just be a miracle that will be needed

Children are a gift from God and as admonished, we are to train them in a way so that they may not depart from it. Be it the right or wrong teaching, it will always come back to hit you. As guardians, help them open up to avoid any unforeseen circumstances.